Lying in bed, writing in my journal and wondering why I feel down, far from myself, and out of place. This is adjusting to a different culture – a culture that I grew up with, but now I feel out of place. This may sound familiar to many other missionaries who go home, but I’ve never experienced it like this.
I went home to Canada on June the 22nd, and returned to Kenya July 26. Being home was bittersweet. I never knew it would be this hard.
I became an aunt on May 26th to a cute boy! 🙂
One month later, on June 25th another cute, adorable boy was born who made me an aunt to 2 of the cutest nephews. 🙂
Spending time with my family and friends was so special!
But in as much as I was happy to see my family and friends, I was trying to adjust to things and changes at home. And let me tell you adjusting is not an easy thing.
I felt down, far from myself, and I felt out of place. I struggled and struggled with this for 4 weeks. I wondered if it was actually worth it coming home – I was happy to see family and friends, but yet I felt out of place, like I didn’t belong.
Where are the hospitable people?
Where is the freedom/love to talk about God?
Where is the dependence on God?
Where is the prayer life of going before God with your praises/requests?
These were some of my questions I asked myself as I saw houses where maybe 5 Kenyan families could have lived in comfortably, but now 1 family and maybe even a small family was living, as I was struck again at how some people, and not even just people, Christians, are so focused on sports/clothes/etc and I wondered if God was actually in their picture. This all than made me realize that maybe the Kenyans are richer than the people in North America. In North America if you’re hungry, you look in the fridge or pantry, and there is plenty to choose from, but somehow you’re not hungry for any of it. You want a drink of water, and you open the faucet. There are no worries of running out of water, or needing to walk many kilometers to fetch water from the river. Your clothes are dirty, so you put them in the washer, and the only thing you actually end up doing is folding it and putting it away. Want to go to college? Your parents will probably help pay for it, and in most cases it won’t be the question “Can we afford it or not”, but instead the question might be “When do you want to go?” or “What do you want to go for”. They have all this and more at their finger tips and believe me its not all wrong, but sometimes its taken to the extreme called materialism. You could say they have their life put together – opportunities, basic needs – a home, education, food, etc., but most people are missing one important thing, a genuine relationship with God and this is why you find people are happier in poor countries, they don’t have much but this leads them to a dependence on God. They are rich in faith.
Talking to God one of the many late nights, I realized, maybe, God had me come home to Canada for more of a reason than I thought. Maybe He had me come home to break me again, to renew my passion, and to work on my heart. Broken – I felt weak and vulnerable, but this is actually where God wants me. “My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, Oh God, will not despise.” Psalm 51:17
And than this started me on the journey to accept that things are different here(its not all right, but they haven’t been on the journey I’m on). I don’t fit in but its ok.
It was after 4 weeks(I was home for 5 weeks) that I started to feel like myself, and it was bittersweet returning to Kenya! And I wished I could have a mix of the 2 worlds – my family and friends, and the fulfilling call to serve these needy and vulnerable children.
Now I’m back home in Kenya, back to my Kenyan friends and brothers and sisters! Its been good being back although of course everything comes with its own challenges – jetlag, and back to the joys and struggles of ministry. If life were easy, we wouldn’t depend on God!
This week I was in the office, so that I could rest before I go to the orphanage next week! I’ve missed the children – their smiles, laughter, and just being with them.
I want to thank you for all your prayers and support – financially, encouragement, and prayer!! It truly means alot!! May God richly bless you! There are a few ways you can share in God’s work. The first and most important is prayer.
Prayer If it weren’t for your prayers, I wouldn’t be in Kenya today. You may not know what your prayers are doing, but they have encouraged me, they have protected me, they have saved children’s lives – spiritually and physically and I give all the glory to God. I want you to join me in praying and thanking God for a few specific things!
1. Thank God for the time I had at home
2. For the protection God gave me while traveling
1. Adjusting back to life here as I get back into my normal routine. Also adjusting back to the “village” life at the orphanage!
2.That God would continue giving me a love and passion, that only comes from Him, for the children!
3. Provision for my daily needs, and the needs around me, which are many and sometimes overwhelming.
Another way you can share in His work is by giving towards His work in Kenya. Would you consider sponsoring me monthly? Or just a one-time donation? Listen to how God wants you to help in His work, whether that’s praying, financially, or both. My monthly expenses are $400 a month, which goes towards my personal needs, accommodation, and other needs I see, ie. helping pay for a child go to school, support to the orphanage, etc. All of the proceeds go to the office in Kitchener, Ontario or in Dalton, Ohio, and then are sent to me in Kenya. The office is not yet set up for automatic transactions, but they accept cheque. When you send money, send a note saying it’s for Charmaine Reimer. If it’s possible when you send monthly donations, send it by the middle of the month, so the money can be sent by the end of the month. You’ll receive a charitable receipt at the beginning of every year. To my Canadian sponsors, you can now give your financial support through Canadahelps.org. You search for African Christian Missions Canada. You will see a place to Donate. You’ll be asked a few questions and than you’ll confirm and send the money. If you are supporting me in any way, I kindly ask you too e-mail me and tell me in what way you are supporting me. If you have any questions concerning this or something else you can email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Thanks for all your support! May God richly bless you for all that you have done! You are changing the life of a child!
African Christian Mission – Canada
575 Lanacaster W Kitchener On
African Christian Mission – USA
213 Greenbrier Lane Dalton, OH